Humor Writing Portfolio - Party Time
Here is some original humor I wrote for the Yahoo! Group: Laugh Lover's.
This writing is about Party Time.
| Are you aware that
your belt does not match your shoes? ME: Are you aware that you are color blind? Is that your third drink? ME: I stopped counting. Don't forget, you're my designated passenger! I think you put on a few pounds since the last party. ME: And I think you pounded a few too many since the last party! "I bet I'm the only one here who has read 5 books in the last week. ME: And I bet you're the only one who cares. You could be attractive if you put your mind to it. ME: And you could be ugly if you didn't wear all that makeup! I think you are rude to always come to parties late. ME: And I think you are rude to always come to parties. You look like you have been up all night. ME: And I'm glad I wasn't up with you. Do you always have to be the center of attention? ME: It sure beats being the center of gravity! I hope you don't bore people with your political opinions tonight. ME: And I hope you don't bore people by opening your mouth. Your sense of humor is too weird for this group. ME: At least I have one. I figure that I'm the smartest person in the room tonight. ME: Good for you since we're all from the School for Dummies! You won't be in such a good mood when you see my new Porsche. ME: And you won't be in such a good mood when you see your new Porsche has four flat tires. I think you are about due for a makeover. ME: I certainly hope it turns out better than your makeover did. You have done well for someone who is not from one of the better families. ME: And you would have done well to keep your big mouth shut! Couldn't you come to the party without your big vocabulary? ME: Stop complaining! I was born this way! My surname is Webster you know. You must like those clothes. Didn't you wear them to the last party? ME: Yes I did. See these stains? I wore them as a reminder to you, because you were person who puked on me! If you went to college where I did, you would know all about art. ME: And if you went to college where I did, you would have dated Art in spite of everything you knew about him. They tell me you had a crush on me back in school. ME: That was before you went to Ugly U.! WHEW! THAT WAS ONE HELLUVA PARTY! |
Mount Laughmore
by Kramer
©2006
Copyright 2006. Kramer. All rights reserved.